I'm the broken doll...

Do you remember those dolls everyone had when we were kids? The ones that shut their eyes when you laid them horizontally? I had one or two growing up and I always had the dolls with the broken eyes. I'd lay her down and one eye would stay locked open while the other twitched somewhere between closed and open. My sister's doll would be sleeping peacefully next to my twitchy awake doll. It's become a theme in my life.
Every night I do the same things to get myself ready for bed. There is the standard face washing and teeth brushing, but in my case it's also taking my sleeping pills and doing mediation in the hopes that I will get some sleep. I wait until I'm dead tired before heading to bed or it's not even worth trying to sleep. K is one of those people that lay down and his eyes close and within a minute, sometimes less, he's sound asleep for the night. I'm the broken doll. I try so hard to sleep, but there always seems to be an eye that doesn't agree and lays there twitchy and waking up the rest of my body. Better yet I'm the version with the shaky legs too! Why can't I just lay down and sleep like other people. I need sleep just like everyone else and would really relish it!
The other night when I was laying in bed with one eye closed and the other half I started computing my sleep for the week. It occurred to me that I clean many more hours a week than I sleep. That's awful! I'm going to be one of those people that spend 1/3 of their life cleaning instead of sleeping!